Nikah Search.com

Traditionally very similar to a Punjabi wedding, the charm of a Sikh wedding lies in its simplicity of customs.

Pre wedding customs:Once the choice of the boy and girl has been finalised, thaka ceremony is performed. This ceremony takes place at the girl's house. In this ceremony a small group of close family members, usually about 8-10 people (from both sides), participate. During this ceremony rings are exchanged and the girl's family gives presents to the boy. This ceremony signifies commitment on each side. The dates for sagai and marriage are also fixed during this ceremony or thereafter. An akhand path or a simple path of Guru Granth Sahib is conducted by the families of both the bride and the groom. The parshad is distributed after the bhog. The kirtan ardas performed on the occasion signifies that the wedding has begun. Sagan is held one or two days before marriage. This ceremony is performed at the boy's house in the morning in the presence of the Guru Granth Sahib. This again is attended by close relatives and friends on each side, usually not exceeding 10 from each side. The girl's relatives visit the boy's house with the 'sagan ka thal' which consists of kesar tikka, gold kara, small gutka (having five bani path), mixed dry fruit (like dried dates, almonds etc.), fruits, mithai and some cash for he boy's family.

The 'chuni chadana' ceremony is mostly clubbed with the sagan ceremony and essentially conducted in the same manner as in a Punjabi wedding. The ceremony takes place at the girl's house in the evening. The close relatives of the boy's family bring a sari, gold ornaments, fruits and sweets to the girl's house. It is usually a very small function. Although the merry making, with marriage songs and dances each night, starts much before the marriage day, a special function called 'ladies sangeet' is arranged one or two days before the marriage. It is organized at both (the girl's and the boy's) places. Relatives, friends and neighbours are invited. It is a very lively function where everybody is in a vibrant mood. They sing and dance to celebrate the occasion. Folk songs are sung. At bride's place 'suhaag' geet (songs) are sung while at the bridegroom's place 'kheri geet' are sung. At the end mithai is served. During this time mehandi is also applied on the bride's hands and feet. This is called mehandi ceremony. The near relatives and the girl's friends (women and girls) also put mehandi on their hands. The next morning (on the day of the marriage), vatna is applied on the girl's body. Vatna is a mixture of haldi, besan and oil. The women sing suhaag geet during this time. After the girl has taken her bath the mama (maternal uncle) puts ivory bangles of painted red colour with kaliras on the bride's arms. This ceremony is called 'chhuda chadana'. Similarly , at the boys' place, vatna is applied to the bridegroom and sehrabandi ceremony is held in the morning. Pagri with a kalgi is put on the bridegroom's forehead. Sagan is given to the boy by the relatives.

Wedding : A simple, charming affair, the traditional Sikh wedding is essentially arranged in a gurudwara.

Bride's attire : The bride's attire usually consists of a salwaar kameez of auspicious red, magenta or orange colour, dupatta must be draped over the head.
Groom's attire: A chudidar and achkan is a Sikh groom's usual attire. A sehra with auspicious number of ladies adorns his head over the turban. A folded cotton shawl is put around his neck and a sword in his hands. As the groom leaves his house with the marriage procession (called baraat) the groom's sister-in -laws applies 'surma' to his eyes as in Punjabis and he gives money to them. The groom's sister plait the hairs on the mane of the mare, then also the groom gives money to his sister.
Milni: When the baraat reaches the bride's house the milni for men takes place. The shabad are sung and aardas is recited as the procession enters the gurudwara or the place where the wedding is arranged. Milni essentially consists of changing garlands by the fathers, grandfathers, chacha, mama, pupha, jija and brothers in that order. After this breakfast is served to the baratis. Depending on the time fixed for the wedding to start, the Guru Granth Sahib kirtan starts much earlier. Both the boy and the girl have to sit together for the kirtan.
Palle tende lagi : The boy's side gives a chunni generally of pink, red or orange colour to the boy who drapes it around his neck and gives one of the ends to the girl to hold. The girl must keep holding it.

Anand Karaj :The panthi reads the first lavan or hymns from the Guru Granth Sahib. It is first read, then sung and the bride and the groom take a round of the Guru Granth Sahib. The bridegroom moves slowly ahead of the bride with sword in his hand. When the round is over, they both sit, bow down and wait for the second lavan or hymn to start. On the fourth and final lavan flowers are showered on the newly wedded couple. Hidaayat or niyams are taught to the bride and the groom. Their duties and responsibilities towards each other as man and wife and towards elder and younger members of each other's families are explained.

The elder members must be considered and respected as parents and younger ones loved as sisters and brothers. The couple promises to stand by each other through ups and downs of life. Keeping the ideals of the Guru Granth Sahib as the foundation, the mentor and guru, the young couple start their new life together praying that whatever they do, say and perform deepens their love and respect for each other. A Guru Granth Sahib rumala is gifted from both sides which is of any auspicious colour with embellishments. Donations or daan to poor people or religious institutions are also made by both sides. After this the relatives from both the bride's and the groom's family garland the newly-wedded couple. Lunch is served once the marriage is over.

Doli: The bride changes into clothes presented by the in-laws after the ceremony is over. While leaving the house the bride throws back grain or rice or jaw. In this way she wishes prosperity for the family that she is leaving.

Reception: The groom's family hosts a reception to introduce the girl to their family and friends. This may be hosted as a dinner or lunch.

Gifts: The girl's side presents gifts to the mother, father, brothers, sisters, mama, dada and nana of the boy. Presenting gifts to other relations is optional.

Milni for women: After the wedding, a formal milni for the ladies may be arranged wherein the female relatives of both the bride and the groom meet each other and exchange garlands. Well-off Sikh families have milni where relatives from the girl's side present jewelry to those from the boy's side. The female relatives who participate in the milni are nani, dadi, mother, sister, masi, mami, bua and chachi.