|
|
|
|
MARRIAGE |
Wedding Style : Japanese Something
old, something new, something borrowed ... Today's Japanese couples enjoy
weaving together their favorite rituals from ancient Japan and modern
Western culture to create an unforgettable wedding day. Japan's
traditional Shinto wedding ceremony is very formal, and usually very private,
with only close family and a few guests present. However, the ceremony
is declining in popularity as nearly two-thirds of couples now choose
a trip down the aisle, Western style. The Shinto
ceremony takes place at a shrine and symbolizes not only the union of
two people, but the uniting of two families. As part of their wedding
vows, the bride and groom exchange cups of sake (rice wine) in the san-san-kudo,
or "three-times-three,"
ceremony. A Western-style ceremony may be held at a church or at one of
the many wedding halls or hotels that have set up chapels specifically
for that purpose. A minister may preside, but, since less than 1 percent
of the population is Christian, it's unlikely that the couple will share
his affiliation. "Most
people marry in Western style even though they are not Christian. It's
just the fashion; it has nothing to do with religion," says Keiko
Okano, a New York publicist who has attended many weddings in Japan. "They
just think it's more romantic and appealing."
Both
Shinto and Western-style ceremonies are followed by an elaborate reception
during which the bride appears in several changes of clothes, a tradition
dating from the 14th century that signifies the bride is prepared to return
to everyday life. At a Shinto reception, the bride, who has been married
in a long white kimono, may arrive in a colorful, embroidered kimono,
change into a Western-style white wedding dress and then into an evening
gown or a party dress. If she has had a Western-style wedding, the order
might be reversed, with her arriving in a wedding dress, then changing
into a kimono and then into one or more party dresses, says Soichiro Taguchi,
assistant vice president of Nikko Hotels International. "The
highlight of the reception is to see what the bride wears," Taguchi
says. At the
reception the couple is introduced, and friends and business colleagues
make speeches honoring the bride and groom. The bride and groom cut the
cake and light a central candle display and candles at the guests' tables.
A banquet
is served, and guests eat and drink — but don't expect to do the electric
slide! "One thing they don't do at Japanese weddings is dance,"
says Okano. However, guests often sing or play an instrument for the newlyweds.
Japanese
couples don't register at the local department store — wedding guests
are expected to give cold, hard cash. The amount varies depending on the
guest's relationship to the bride. The money Since
wedding receptions in Japan can be extremely expensive, a growing number
of Japanese couples choose to be married abroad. "If
you get married in Japan, you are expected to have a big wedding reception
and to invite your business colleagues, bosses, friends and relatives,"
says Taguchi. "If you get married in Hawaii, you can invite fewer
guests, plus you can have your honeymoon there — it saves a lot of money."
As recently
as 1970, more than 40 percent of Japanese marriages were arranged, designed
to link two families together. Today less than 10 percent of marriages
are arranged and those that are more likely result from a computer matching
service than the traditional "go-between." Marriage in Japan
has changed tremendously over the past few decades, and changes are still
underway as people marry later, women consider keeping their surnames,
and remaining single becomes an increasingly acceptable option.
|
|||||||||
